


Miscommunication

by iluvaqt



Series: His Best Girl [23]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Baby, Childbirth, F/M, Microphones, Misunderstandings, Protectiveness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-05-25 07:26:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6185824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iluvaqt/pseuds/iluvaqt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nothing good ever came from eavesdropping yet in the age of digital surveillance, there's no escaping it. Conversations and embarrassing reveals proves to be a hazard whilst being surrounded by said technology. Which in turn prompts a surprise arrival.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Miscommunication

 

The tool box he'd been rummaging around in, spilled sockets and wrenches over the table, one of them accidentally typing seemingly random commands that had the speakers blaring out Darcy's voice in surround sound.

_"I had the best treatment yesterday. I honestly feel like a new woman."_

Tony opened his mouth, his small screw driver bouncing harmlessly to the floor when he realized what had just occured. He was unwittingly privy to the girls' catchup, gossip-fest going on upstairs.

He saw Rhodey and Bucky through the glass and about to enter the door but he was too far from the keyboard to turn it off. It would only occur to him later that he should have just asked JARVIS to cut the feed and save himself from the death stare Bucky sent him and everything else that followed.

He was a self assured, mostly honest man and he had no trouble sharing his concerns or fears with anyone who really cared to listen. Especially to those he counted as friends. So it was with no hesitation that he admitted quite unrepentantly, "Barnes is freaking me out, Rhodey. Why is he in here?" The Howling Commando, Winter Soldier assassin gave him chills and there was no way he'd ever stay alone with the guy, anywhere. He fancied breathing too much to ever accidentally let his mouth run away from him and end up on Bucky's bad side.

_"Treatment? I thought you had a facial with Jane last week?"_

It was Pepper speaking and Tony felt immediately less anxious. Only she could do that. Set him at ease. They'd been a team for so long that he trusted her implicitly and even if she was mad, he knew what to say to talk her around.

" _Oh this is a different beauty treatment. If you haven't had a steam exfoliation, I highly recommend it. Here feel."_

Rhodey shot Tony an uncomfortable look with a raised eyebrow. Beside him Bucky was shifting in clear agitation. Just what was his girlfriend asking them to feel, Tony was sure he read that expression right. "I'm giving him the tour of the place. Pepper added four new floors for the Avengers use, plus you said you had something for me-Why are we listening to the ladies upstairs?"

" _Oh wow, that's so soft. That's from one treatment? Do you do anything in between? I mean I loofah everyday and I'm pretty sure my skin's never felt like that."_

Felicity sounded envious and off course Cap chose that moment to join the trio.

"Stark, I need to to take a look at the shield. It's been giving off a faint trace of energy, and it's never felt like that before... Why are you listening to my wife?" His disapproving tone and the immediate scowl he gave Tony had the man in question backing up in surrender.

"It was an accident," he protested.

_"I've always loofah'd and if I can't reach, I get Steve to do it."_

The tips of Cap's ears turned red and Tony couldn't fight the smirk that immediately sprung to his face. "And I'm sure that's such an odious task too."

"Stark," he growled in warning.

" _You have great skin, Felicity. I'm sure you'd come up glowing. If you do go, ask for Alexi and get a décolletage scrub."_

 _"A say what?"_ Maria spluttered.

She sounded both taken aback and intrigued, as though wondering if she'd heard right. Steve and Bucky shared a look, wondering the exact same thing.

" _Décolletage, you know, neck and boobage, the valley between the mounds of womanhood."_

Felicity chuckled at Darcy's elaboration, while all the men merely shifted uneasily and stared each other down. Steve look morally conflicted, Bucky looked like he wanted to break something, Rhodey looked like he'd sucked on a lemon and Tony was morbidly curious, really a perpetual state of existence for him. Still no one made any attempt to mute the audio feed.

"The girls don't know that anyone is listening to this," Steve pointed out, his posture betraying his reluctance to leave, even though the furrow between his brows and the tick in his jaw spoke of how much he didn't like what they were doing.

"There's the door," Tony quipped impatiently, shushing the man with a narrowed glare when he looked about to protest again.

Steve was about to snap at Tony for his blatant disrespect but Bucky elbowing him in the ribs diverted his attention. He shot a look of hurt betrayal at his friend before he realized Darcy was talking again.

" _It felt amazing. Sure it was a little weird at first but they use this micro bead scrub and you can barely see anything through all that steam. And you felt my arm. Imagine that everywhere."_

All eyes shot to Bucky, who glared at the floor.

Tony dared to ask. "Everywhere?"

The look Bucky gave him, despite having the theoretical ability to send a better man crying for the hills, didn't deter the gifted mechanic in the slightest. In for a pound as the saying went, "Do they do you know, the top of the.." he made a crude motion toward his behind and made a v shape with his hands. "Between... Usually that's the best place to tell a woman's age. Unless they bleach and Brazilian wax, then you're pretty much screwed."

No one but Steve even saw Bucky move. Honestly, Steve had been ready for something like this to happen the moment he understood where this conversation was going.

Steve got in Bucky's path and both of them went crashing through the desk. But Bucky wasn't done. In the process of trying to wrestle free from Steve's grip to get at Tony, they knocked into another workstation, activating a suit of armor that Tony had been working on. Taking on a life of its own, parts started zipping all over the lab. One clocking Tony in the head, knocking him out cold. Rhodey threw himself to the floor to avoid the same treatment.

Hearing a loud commotion, his lab adjoining Tony's, Bruce came to investigate. One look had him wrongly assessing the situation. Assuming Bucky to be under some kind of mind control, he Hulked out and barrelled through the door, swatting flying equipment like they were pesky insects. He yanked Bucky off Steve and threw him across the room.

Steve got up quickly and moved to intervene before things could get even more out of hand. Yet, in the same moment, the Hulk was still moving and he had yanked Bucky off his feet, preparing to smash him to the floor.

"Hulk, stand down." Steve kept a respectable, non-threatening distance but keeping his shield at the ready, suddenly very grateful that he had brought it down in the first place.

Bucky was beyond angry now, why was it always everyone's first assumption that he was the threat? There was a indestructible rage monster whose head only just cleared the ceiling, standing only two floors below where the women were. In particular, his human girlfriend who didn't stand a chance against the Hulk. He used his metal arm to punch Hulk in the face with all the force he could muster. The creature dropped him in surprise and staggered back a step.

Steve knew they were in trouble the moment Bucky attacked the Hulk and took stock of the situation. "Bucky, get out of here now."

The tone Steve used was his no nonsense Captain giving orders voice and Bucky pulled a disgruntled face but complied immediately.

As soon as Bucky had cleared the exit, Steve ordered JARVIS to lock down the tower. He didn't want the girls coming to investigate. And he wanted to make it as difficult as possible for the Hulk to move around anywhere. Not that a couple doors or walls would stop him for more than a second. Steve only hoped that he didn't decide to smash any load bearing ones.

"Hulk, stop. You need to listen, please. No one is trying to hurt you," he pleaded. The red hue in the Hulk's eyes when he turned his gaze on him, didn't give him much comfort.

"Stark down. Cap is hurt."

Steve felt the corner of his lip which was bleeding and his arm didn't feel so hot, he'd pinched a nerve somewhere. "Just a scratch," he said quickly. "Tony knocked himself out. You've seen how he works. He's makes his own hazards. The man needs to come with a warning. You know we have this under control. Everyone needs to just dial things back here. The girls are upstairs, you need to calm down."

Obviously it was the wrong thing to say. The Hulk looked at those same stairs that Bucky had just torn up and barrelled right through the locked door.

"Aw crap," Steve said making to tear after him.

Rhodey was only one step behind him. "You just had to go and say that."

Upstairs, Felicity had felt the first vibration of something hitting a wall hard. Maria noticed her expression and it seems Natasha was instantly alert too. Something was going on.

"JARVIS, is the tower secure? Threat analysis?"

" _The Hulk is in the building. Mr. Rogers is attempting to subdue him. His probability of success is 67%."_

Natasha and Felicity shared a look. "Those aren't good odds."

Felicity awkwardly got off the couch, her stomach was slowing her down even more these days. She had to scoot to the edge and then push herself up.

Pepper who had been sitting closest immediately put her hand on her elbow restricting any further attempt to leave the lounge area.

"You might be most resilient out of all of us, but right now you're also the most vulnerable. If anything happened to you and the baby..." She trailed off, her voice thick with concern.

Felicity knew she was right. While she's always been able to break through the Hulk's fear and rage, she couldn't take the risk he might hurt her, even unintentionally.

"You need to stay here," Natasha said in complete agreement. "Everyone should." Obviously she didn't include herself in that statement since she was going for the elevator.

Another impact cause the floor to rock and Natasha jabbed at the elevator button with no response.

A loud roar sounded and glass exploded everywhere as the Hulk burst through the plate glass windows.

Maria's face shifted into a stern mask of cool professionalism. "JARVIS, operational override. Voice Print Maria Hill. Code Word Balderdash. Felicity, bunker everyone in Tony's panic room. Pepper will show you the way. Natasha?" she scouted for the redheaded super spy, and froze to see she had put herself between everyone and the enormous, imposing figure that was the Hulk.

"Hulk, stop," Natasha said firmly.

Somehow at that moment Bucky had dropped into the room from where, no one knew, probably the trash chute or the heating vents. He grabbed Darcy and put himself in front of her like a human shield backing her to the elevator that had opened to reveal the battered looking Steve and the Iron Patriot.

"Everyone freeze," Natasha growled when she saw the Hulk shift to aggressive mode at the newcomers.

Steve clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth and looked worriedly at Felicity who was caught in the corridor leading to the bedrooms, much too far for him to get to without barrelling through several of his friends first and possibly aggravating the Hulk further. She could take care of herself but he knew she trusted the Hulk's control more than he did, and he couldn't help but be concerned she would someday regret that faith. He saw Hulk as an instinctual creature with very little impulse control. In Steve's opinion, the Hulk only recognized threats and non threats. His face and body language right now, Steve wouldn't be surprised if he perceived everyone in degrees of danger to his freedom and a threat to his person.

Natasha's voice softened a lot and she stretched her hand out slowly, palm up to prove she that she had no weapon. "We're safe. Whatever happened downstairs, you can tell me. Nobody's going anywhere, nobody is going to get hurt."

"He hurt Cap. He hurt Tony," he said in his deep, gravelly voice. Glaring and baring his teeth in Bucky's direction.

"Ah guys," Felicity said, her voice suspiciously wobbly. "I think baby's coming."

"But we've still got two weeks," Steve protested, his voice climbing several octaves.

"Well I'm pretty sure I didn't just pee," Felicity said with obvious nervousness.

All eyes went to the pinkish puddle growing in size at her feet.

Hulk let out a very odd noise a cross between a squeak and a grunt before he seemed to shrink at a rate faster than anyone of them had seen before. Natasha threw the blanket from the back of the couch over Bruce's shifting shoulders blades.

"Maria, get my medical bag from my room. Pepper, we need plenty of hot water and towels. Tash, help put Liss in Barnes' room. Cap, you might want to stop panicking and have someone fetch Felicity's birthing bag, baby's coming," Bruce ordered before he'd even caught his breath from shrinking down.

Steve fished his keys out of his jeans. "We keep it in the trunk," he said shakily, pressing the keys into Rhodey's waiting hands. "Felicity has had it ready since she hit 32 weeks."

"Smart woman. Always prepared."

It was almost twenty four hours later that a red, flailing and loud baby girl made her appearance.

Bucky had been in and out running for food for the birth support crew, which included Natasha, Bruce and Steve and he'd seen his bed absorb all manner of fluids. He was never sleeping in it again. They were burning it. He didn't utter a word of complaint though. He felt partially responsible for Felicity going into early labor. Bruce seemed to sense his unease and looked up from where he'd been doing a final check on Felicity's blood pressure. She hadn't lost enough to warrant a transfusion, but she'd passed out multiple times after they'd taken her to and from the bathroom while she'd been in labor. He was being thorough and erring on the side of caution. Felicity and Steve both wanted this done without outside intervention but if they needed a qualified OBGYN, they had one on standby. Clint offered to pick him up by Quinjet if the situation called for it. Tony and Pepper were all for it, saying they'd write it up as a employee emergency, technically it was. Felicity was still consulting on a casual basis for Stark Industries.

"If anyone's to blame for physical harm and property damage it's me. With the situations we face on a regular basis, I should have asked. I put everyone in the tower at risk by letting my fear and anger loose."

Felicity grabbed his hand as he moved to pull away, guilt written all over his face. She held his wrist and looked between both Bucky and Bruce pointedly. "We're all okay, it was a misunderstanding. Although from what I might have overheard Steve say to Natasha earlier, if anyone's taking responsibility for the misunderstanding, it's Tony. I would steer clear of him for the next few days if you don't fancy being collateral damage."

Bruce snorted a laugh. "He brings it on himself." His comment even managed to get Bucky to twitch a small smile.

"Hey, Bucky, stop idling and get over here and meet your god daughter."

The look of surprise and wonder on his best friend's face was priceless. He had a thought that he wished he had a camera when a flash went off in the corner of his eye.

"Got it," Felicity said triumphantly.

Steve turned back and pressed a kiss to her sweaty temple. "Always ready."

"Born ready," she quipped. "A little like this princess. She couldn't wait anymore. 12 days early and she's absolutely perfect. Certainly nothing wrong with her lungs or her muscles," she said of the vice grip, their baby had on her finger, which was purpling at the end. Steve pried her tiny fingers open and offered his own to give Felicity a break.

Bucky slowly came closer and Felicity lifted her arms to offer up her swaddled bundle. "Are you sure?"

"She won't break," Felicity teased and all but thrust her into Bucky's arms. Steve was a little more reserved and made sure that his arms were properly positioned and his little girl's head and neck supported on a good angle before he drew his hands away.

"What did you call her?" Bucky asked his voice soft and suspiciously hoarse.

"Sarah. Sarah Rogers," Steve answered proudly.

Felicity nodded in agreement, her eyes filling with tears as she watched Bucky and Steve look at her daughter with total adoration. If this kept up she was going to have her work cut out for her as the disciplinarian parent. Barely minutes new to the world and she had two of the most battled hardened, most feared and respected heroes of their time hanging on her every breath.

Steve managed to tear his gaze away from the tender scene next to him and looked at his exhausted but never more beautiful wife. He brushed his fingers tenderly over Felicity's cheek. "My girls. My best girls," his said voice hitching.

They had everything they'd ever dared to dream for. They were a family. They were safe and surrounded by loved ones as they welcomed their baby girl into the world. It didn't get better than this.


End file.
